Srs Bsns Breakfast
by Sushi Chi
Summary: Puck doesn't have a social filter, Kurt is angry when he doesn't have coffee, and they found a Waffle House.  Puck/Kurt


**Disclaimer: I don't own Glee in any way shape or form.  
A/N: Silly little fic. For my Tumblr Friends. You know who you are. And if you find this story on my LJ you'll see a surprise of some graphics I made. You can find the link via my profile here. It's listed as my homepage. Anyway, Enjoy the fic!**

Sophie sighed as she started a fresh pot of coffee. Saturdays were always harder than week days. Always more people getting breakfast, but usually better tips. Regulars never tipped much, if at all. Tapping her foot, she brushed some hair out of her face as she heard the door open. "Just seat yourselves." She said before turning around and seeing two teenagers move to a booth.

Grabbing a couple of menus she walked over to the booth, looking them over. The one with the Mohawk looked happy, huge grin on his face. He was tapping some sort of tune on the table while the other was glaring at his friend's hands as if he had a hangover. The other teen looked like he hated everything about life.

"Welcome to Lela's Waffle House. I'm Sophie, I'll be your waitress today."

"Morning, Sophie." Mohawk said with a flirty smirk. She swallowed suddenly, she hadn't expected a grin like that to be unleashed on her. "Neither of us have been here before and I want to make sure that this could be heaven," he paused, "I've heard you have unlimited waffles. Is this true?"

She smiled, "Yes. It's true. Lela's Waffle House has unlimited waffles." Holding back a chuckle at Mohawk's enthusiasm at the news, she said, "I'm guessing that's what you want then?"

Mohawk paused, "Depends. Are your waffles any good? Fluffy and golden? Do I get whipped topping and fruit on it? Is the syrup warm?"

"All of that." Sophie answered.

"I'll take the waffles then." Mohawk nodded. "And a glass of OJ."

She looked at the other teen, "Do you need a menu? Or are you going with waffles, like your friend?"

The other teen glared at her, "He's not my friend," Glare spat out, "he's my boyfriend, thankyouverymuch. And we've never been here before, of course I need a menu." Discontent came off him in waves.

Mohawk put a hand over Glare's. "You must excuse him Sophie, he hasn't had any coffee today."

"And whose fault is that?" Glare turned his anger on Mohawk, "You're the one who broke my beloved coffee pot."

"Which is why I'm buying." Mohawk winked, Glare just glowered.

Sophie cleared her throat, "So, coffee for you."

Glare then turned to her, eyes big and anger dried up, "_Oh God, yes please_."

Sophie raised her eyebrows, "Okay then. I'll be right on that." Handing over a menu to Glare, she went to get their drinks.

When she came back with coffee and OJ, she heard Mohawk talking to Glare, who had his eyes closed, "We should come here every Saturday. Unlimited waffles! Forget every Saturday, this is a Waffle House. We can go on dates here. I can have waffles every day if I want."

Glare growled out, "We won't be coming back here unless their coffee is good. If they have shitty coffee like that damn 10th Street Cafè we won't be coming back."

Mohawk nodded, "Understood Star Shine."

Glare's eyes narrowed, "What have I told you about pet names?"

"To not to do them, but babe, come on?" Mohawk said, "Who am I without using some sort of pet name for my coffee addict?"

Sophie finally made it right beside the table, "Drinks." She handed over the OJ as Glare reached for the coffee. Glare smiled down at it, she was expecting him to start cooing and wooing it. "Have you decided what you want to order?"

"French Toast." Glare said as he cupped his coffee.

"Alright. I'll go put the order in, enjoy your coffee." Sophie said and turned, hearing Mohawk laugh as she walked away.

Glare and Mohawk kept coming back.

Sophie raised an eyebrow as she brought them menus at their second appearance to Lela's. Glare seemed to be in a much better mood and Mohawk was the sullen one this time. "I'm Sophie," She started, knowing that they probably didn't remember her name, "and welcome to Lela's Waffle House."

Glare smiled at her, "Yes, Sophie. I'd like some coffee."

"You always want some coffee." Mohawk slumped in his seat.

"I apologize for my boyfriend, he had a bad day." Glare patted Mohawk's hand. "So, I thought some waffles would cheer him up."

Sophie nodded, "And what would you like?"

Glare glanced at the menu, "I'll try your scrambled eggs and toast. Thanks."

She smiled and decided that maybe she should change their names. Glare didn't Glare much this time. He seemed rather happy, Mohawk was the one Sophie was expecting glares from today.

It didn't take long for her to reassign names to Glare and Mohawk.

Sophie was used to the conversation at a table to die down when she'd bring food or check for a refill, but these two didn't follow the norm. "I don't know why you're so bothered by this." Coffee said, giving Sophie and smile and nod when she raised her coffee pot in question on if it he wanted a refill.

"How can you _not_ be upset?" Waffles scoffed and crossed his arms.

"Easily." Coffee replied. "I wasn't a fan of that TV show. I don't care of they canceled it."

"You should care." Waffles stated simply. "Because I care. You're my boy toy, you should care what I care about."

Coffee rolled his eyes, "And by that logic you should care about all the things I care about."

"I like cars." Waffles tried.

"I like a lot more things than cars." Coffee sipped his coffee, "I'll protest the cancellation of your show if you have a Project Runway marathon with me and we go into some in-depth discussions over it."

Sophie walked away, thinking that the two of them probably wouldn't last long together.

Waffles and Coffee started to be semi-regulars. And as Sophie worked whenever she could, she was usually the one waiting on them. Whenever she saw them come in, she's bring one menu and cup of coffee right away. Waffles always ordered his namesake and Coffee would have hearts in his eyes when she brought the drink. Though she never knew what Coffee would order, if anything at all. Sometimes he'd just sip on his drink.

Sophie would always hear bits of their conversation. She never told anyone what she heard, but she found herself really hoping they'd stay together, not matter how unlikely. Sophie couldn't help but feel involved in their relationship, even if she didn't know their names, because of their memorable conversations.

Coffee giggled into his cup, "I still can't get over it."

"Shudap." Waffles said, pointing with his fork that had some waffle at the end, "So what if my middle name is Abba. It was my grandpa's name. And he was awesome. He survived WWII."

Coffee sobered up at that, "Oh. I hadn't known that."

"Yeah." Waffles shrugged. "Okay then, two can play at this. You know my middle name, what's yours?"

"Elizabeth." Coffee answered before turning to Sophie, "I think I'd like a danish. Thanks."

Waffles rolled his eyes, "Don't lie to me, Star Shine. I need the truth. You know mine, I wanna know yours."

Coffee locked eyes with Waffles, "Elizabeth. It's legally my mid-."

Sophie quick got the danish, knowing that it was eavesdropping, but she wanted to know how Coffee got stuck with Elizabeth as his middle name.

"-ude, your dad wouldn't name you that." Waffles said.

"It was my mom's name." Coffee said quietly, "I was six when she died. I didn't understand death and felt like she left me. Dad tried to explain the best he could, said that she was still with me." He nodded to Sophie as a thanks when she sat the danish down, "He suggested that I change my middle name so that I knew she was always with me."

It was a different day that it was hard for Sophie to keep her mouth closed and not comment.

"Oh my God." Coffee said, eyes wide. "You did _not_ just say that."

Waffles shrugged, "What? I totes wanna get a Kitchen Dildo when I get my own place. Or our own place."

"Not that I want to know," Coffee said, idly tapping his cup, "but what is a Kitchen Dildo?"

"Well, you know how I like to cook and I've been doing more fancy foods and shit?" Coffee nodded, Sophie said nothing but refilled Waffes' water, "Well, you know that one dildo that kinda spins? Yeah, that'd be perfect for stirring sauces."

Coffee shook his head, "You know, there is this thing that you seem to be missing. It's called a Social Filter. You should look into that."

"Bitch." Waffles responded.

"You love it." Coffee winked.

They were always friendly and Sophie would look forward to seeing them. She kept reminding herself that the two of them would probably break-up soon. Young love like that hardly ever lasted. But week after week, she kept seeing them together.

"Hey, Soph." Waffles said, "You weren't here last time, have a good day off?"

Sophie licked her lips, "Actually, I was sick. So, no, not really a good day off." She flashed a grin.

"I'm sorry to hear that." Coffee said, "Glad to see you're better."

Laughing, she said, "I bet. I heard that you traumatized a co-worker."

Coffee raised an eyebrow, "I needed coffee."

Waffles rolled his eyes, "Yeah, he hadn't had a cup for like, an hour and a half." He looked at Sophie, "He needed his fix. You know how he is."

She laughed, "Indeed I do."

Coffee just rolled his eyes. "Stop exaggerating. It's childish."

Waffles burst out laughing, "How are we exaggerating? Listen, Star Shine," he ignored Coffee's glare, "you yelled at the nice lady. For no reason. You even suggested that she was part of my pool service. And you weren't nice about it."

Coffee was not amused.

All waitresses had their favorite patrons, and Sophie wasn't surprised that Waffles and Coffee were her's. She never knew what Coffee would be wearing or what they would be talking about. Even more than that, they seemed to care about her, at least as much as regulars ever do. Before she knew it, it had been a year of seeing them at Lela's.

There had been plenty of times she had to deal with Coffee when he was in a horrible mood, and more often than not, she was amused by his insults he's spit out. Waffles was, she knew he had fun watching his boyfriend go from glaring to normal.

Waffles was usually in a decent mood, always easy to deal with. Every once in a while he'd throw Sophie a curve ball and he'd order something that wasn't waffles. But that only happened about once every month or two. He'd flirt with Sophie, and she'd grin at him, finding it amusing. Luckily, Coffee never acted jealous.

The last time she saw them, there was a cloud of melancholy surrounding them. It was when Coffee was using the restroom that Waffles explained.

"Soph, thought I should warn you." He started, "Kurt is going to New York. He's leaving next week."

She nodded, mentally changing Coffee's name to Kurt. "Going to school there, I take it?"

Waffles nodded. "And I don't think we could manage a long distance relationship. I'll miss the sex and he'll meet all new people. It wouldn't last."

"I'm guessing you two have talked about this?" Sophie asked. "Because this explains the mood."

"Yeah." Waffles said sadly. "It sucks out loud and all. But I didn't get into anywhere near there." He shrugged. "So, I might start drowning myself with waffles soon."

"Only natural." Sophie flashed a sad smile.

It was after the third time that Waffles showed up by himself in two weeks that she down next to him for a second, "Listen," he looked up mid-chew, "I know you're missing Coff-Kurt and I can guarantee that he's missing you. Just because you didn't get into school up there doesn't mean you have to stay here and do nothing. I never thought that you were a coward, you're brave enough to go after what you want. To say what you want." She sighed. "Listen, from day one I've been expecting you two to break up. You guys always proved me wrong and I don't want that one relationship I've seen to die just because high school is over. Let it end over something else, if it does end."

After a thought, Sophie added, "Don't let someone else learn how to deal with him when he hasn't had his coffee."

Waffles put down his fork. "You're right Soph. I'm Noah Fucking Puckerman. I'm too badass for Lima." His voice got more excited and sure of himself as he continued, "No one else had been able to tame me into a relationship before him and I can't let someone else tame him in the mornings." Puck stood up suddenly and grabbed Sophie's face before kissing her on the lips, "I'm going to New York and do who the hell knows for a job and have awesome sex with Kurt." Throwing down some money he grinned, "Thanks Soph. I'll send ya post card from New York."


End file.
